God Sent Me a Memo This Morning : )

Last night, I got a phone call from the head of Women's Ministry at church wondering if I would be interested in being a part of a new ministry she was developing. It was a great ministry opportunity, but I had to say no. It was the fifth time this summer alone I've been invited to lead or be a part of ministry opportunities and this was my fifth "no." She was gracious and understanding, but I was discouraged.

I have so much on my plate already...enough that I am having to drop out of many commitments just to be ready for our baby to be born. Three years earlier, I asked God to allow me to minister to women, yet here I was saying no to every opportunity I was given. I went to bed feeling guilty and confused.

My first instinct was to call a friend, but I was reminded of something Zoe Elmore wrote in a devotion I read awhile back. She said, "Run to the throne, not the phone." So I prayed. I knew God was the only one who would "get" what I was feeling. He alone understood my dreams and my guilt. It was a rambling prayer, but I fell asleep with peace.

Then this morning I picked up one of the books I'm reading and came across this quote:

"People will always ask you to do more than God asks. She quotes Alan Redpath, who said, 'Say yes to the burden that God puts on your heart and say no to everything else.' A whole lot of things can wait for a different season in your life or even for just a different time of year."

(From "An Interview With Carol Kent" in For the Write Reason: 31 Writers, Editors, and Agents Share Their Experiences With Christian Publishing edited by Marybeth Whalen.)

I couldn't believe how relevant it was for me right then. It was as if God sent me a personal memo. I was instantly released from the guilt of saying no, and excited to answer this question, "What burden has God put on my heart?"

Here's what I came up with:

- Being a good mom and wife. This is my current season of life, and I have to say no to many things in order to keep Pat and the kids first. After Benjamin is born and our adoption is complete, my home life is going to require even more attention and time. This is my top priority.
- I also reaffirmed my burden for encouraging women who have gone through pregnancy loss. That's where my heart is right now. That is what my book is about. God's little memo to me confirmed it is OK to want to focus on that area of ministry, and it is OK to protect my time so I can do what is necessary to get my book published and my message into the hands of the women I know it can help.

As the seasons change, so will be my ability to say "yes."

I was so thankful for God's personal touch in my life this morning and I just wanted to share it and thank Him for it.

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